The mind

Black Box

Sometimes, I hate the human mind. I hate the human mind and its ability to constantly live in the past. Reliving how different things were exactly a year ago, remembering how much happier you were or completely carefree.

I hate how we don’t appreciate things when we have them. And then spend centuries regretting and grieving our losses.

I hate not living in the present, always wishing, always hoping, always ‘can’t wait’ing for this to happen, or that. And the second it happens, it doesn’t end up being as good as I’ve built it up in my mind.

Or, if it was, my mind never lets me live it down during the normal days (AKA everyday).

I hate how things that happened 5 or 10 years ago still create space in my mind.

I hate how in 5 or 10 years things that happened today will affect me every single day, playing like an infinite loop.

I hate how my mind never forgets.

I hate that I over think, think things that will never happen.

I hate that I think about people that don’t deserve it.

Sometimes, I hate that I have so much love to give.

I hate how the human mind lives in the past and is anxious about the future, but never for today.

There’s always something to look forward to.

A new season, a new month, a new experience.

There’s always something or someone to miss.

But today moves on. And is gone before you know it.

How is that living, tell me?

Only survival instincts.

I hate that there is so much wonderful beauty and colour out there.

But the human mind clouds it with grey.

And oh so small.

Or maybe that’s not the human mind.

Because people forget. People don’t care enough.

Maybe it’s just mine.


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